The Old Man in the Shop and Being Yourself

“The world is your oyster.”

It has been said thousands of times to thousands of people. These and many similar cliché phrases passed around at graduation. such as “be yourself” “follow your dreams” “the world is there for your taking.” “Live a little” “Enjoy life.”

And so on and so on. But do we really mean it? In most cases, I am afraid we don’t. 

I said in most cases, because there clearly are exceptions. Those cases are when the advice is to a 15-25 year old, wealthy, upper-middle class, white person in western Europe, the United States, or Canada. When it is said to those people, people really do mean it.

If you are young and child of a wealthy person, then please by all means, go travel the world. Back pack through Europe and Asia, visit South America, paint for a year, sing, and write. 

But what if the person is poor, do we really mean it? Go live your dreams we say! But, are we thinking even as we mutter it, “there is no way that kid will ever get out of here”?

Unfortunately, this is often the case. Travelling generally is something for the wealthy, the white, and the western. Until I met the man in the shop.

I was walking with a few friends through Mae La refugee camp. Yes, the refugee camp. Mostly the people who live here are, well, refugees. Most are poor, and the conditions are, well, very poor. The sun beaming hot above, most take refuge in whatever shelter they can find, he was resting in one of the many small shops, a glass of water in front of him, enjoying the company of the shopkeepers while carrying on business as usual. He was wearing many beaded necklaces around his neck. My friend wanted to stop and talk, and I am glad she did.

He was extremely friendly, told us to have a seat, and gave us some crackers, and proceeded to tell us about his life.

The man's tatoo on his arm from when he was in Karen army

He spent his time as a KNLA soldier, fighting for Karen independence. He later came to Thailand and spent four years taking care of the elephant of the King of Thailand. From this he somehow was able to get Thai papers.

Now he travels. He has walked all over Burma and Thailand. According to him, over the past 7 years he has bathed a total of 9 times. Yes you read that right. In other words he bathes approximately 1.3 times every year. (Which now that I think of him handing me crackers is a little disturbing.)

He only consumes liquids and fruit. He carries beads and other necklaces. He is not married and never has been. He is 60 years old.  I was glad I got to shake his hand and take my picture with my fellow bachelor and traveler in the game of life.

Now his life is not the dream of many, or even any other people, but he is living it. He is living his life, he is being himself, he is content. He is doing it as a non-white, non-wealthy, and non-western Karen person.

He is Karen, poor, from Burma, and 60 years old. If he can do it then I suppose anybody can.

Moral: do not let anyone get in your way. Be yourself, and if you don’t feel you can, just think of a 60 year old Karen man in Mae Lah refugee camp who has bathed 9 times in the last 7 years and know that you can.